Well I haven't been able to update or create any posts for the past...3 months. Heh. Mostly because school life has been a little rocky in some situations, especially right now because I've got two tests coming up tomorrow. On the bright side, I just have to work tonight and rest all day/night when I come home tomorrow!! Let's see what's new so far..I will try to make a post about positivity, because honestly I am the most positive person in most situations yet I have not preached about it! I must! I know I have lost quite a number of viewers/readers, but I will try to remain consistent with my posts and writing. Now! For a lesson on sexy guys...
I have a friend that has been boy crazy since we've known each other. Approximately throughout our 4 years of friendship, she has had feelings for at least three guys. :P (I can be exaggerating, but at the same time not really.) Before she went for the looks. The sexy abs, the sexy eyes, the perfect hair and complexion. Well, let me tell you a story of mine during middle school.
There was a very popular boy who was in a relationship with a very popular girl as well. They were in the same social groups, they were good looking, athletic; everything was perfect pretty much. At that point they'd been together for quite a long time. Middle school sweethearts, you could say.
One day during lunch break, I decided to isolate myself from my wondrous group of friends and do homework while eating. I'm the very productive type (explains why blogging wasn't top 1 on my to-do list.), so I like to use my time very wisely. I got out my math workbooks (Not gonna lie, workbooks were so ****** easy to do.) I finished eating and just nommed on some apple slices, got out my calculator and I'm listenin' to my classical music.
This couple I'm talking about were sitting diagonally across from me, but the girl was a lot further away for me to see. While I was doing some calculations, I seriously felt someone staring at me. "Oh, he could be just staring at someone else. Its fine." 5 bloody minutes later into this death stare, I look up from my glasses and the kid immediately fled his eyes from me as if he was not even staring. completely innocent, I tell you. Not. Mind you, his girlfriend was right next to him.
So it was an uncomfortable experience for me as an awkward duckling when it comes to boys. I had no idea if he was staring at me, or my big calculator and homework. Certainly I looked up, he instantly looked away. If only I had a clarifcation if he was staring or not.
I started getting the idea that he might have had a small thing for me. (Relationships can have its flaws, so he must have had problems or didn't like her as much, or whatever.) I had a small thing for him too, because it felt a good self-esteem raise that someone as a possibility was staring at me. It truly was uncomfortable, so boys.. please don't stare like that. If you're gonna stare, talk!
And this was a full out stare, he didn't really shift his staring. I was pretty certain that I had nothing on my nose or face, nor my teeth 'cause I was not smiling. All I was doing was getting some work done in a big comfy and cute green sweater. It made me blush, especially since this kid was the hottest in 6th grade. But this was in 8th grade guys. :P
After a couple of days later, i decided to see if he would stare again. He didn't, and I just read a romance novel throughout. (I am a complete bookworm, also a hopeless romantic. Give me a romance novel, and I'll devour it in a week.)
He had two of my classes. And he did another funny thing during a video notes session in History class.
During the video, we were required to write notes out for a future essay and I have a habit of getting irritated looking up and down a screen for notes. I simply just stare at the video and continue writing in my scribbly messy hand writing. Honestly, its such a better technique for me. :P Anyway during the video I was writing like usual, doing my own thang. I glanced at the kid a couple of times, to see if he was staring at me. He wasn't. Mind you I have the BEST peripheral vision, so I am pretty good with instincts in some situations. While I was looking down my notes and writing, the kid did the old stretching and looking sleek skill. (Its not sleek.). He was turning around to stretch out his stomach muscles and such, and I glanced up the screen and wrote without looking. He took a double take! As if it was unbelievable that I can do this skill. He kept this stretching thing up for the rest of the hour. Looking sideways and everything. It was pretty creepy, but I don't know about you but I kind of liked being stared at.. Its like that mission accomplished feeling, a winner feeling. Because it just is!
This went on for a couple of months, and well he looked pretty darn happy with his mate. It was probably reading into things too much; I have the tendency to do so. Guys are just so easy to misunderstand you know? At first I simply thought he was downright handsome and sexy, but well lemme tell you.. we were from complete different social groups, I wasn't as beautiful as his girl, and even if it was to happen.. it wouldn't happen because it wouldn't work out. It wasn't even, and I realized that.. just because you've got an eye candy, doesn't mean that you don't have feelings for them.
I soon developed feelings for this guy. Despite his 'popular' flaws (listens to gossip, once called a girl ugly around his friends (it wasn't around the girl), but hey maybe they were all peer pressured.), I couldn't resist it. As much as I didn't want to like this guy, I couldn't help it but try to flaunt my looks, try to be cutesy; try to catch his attention somehow. I was too self-centered to think that this happy kid with his girl would ever have the possibility of liking me. So, guys. I think its important to not get led on by stares, because you can easily misunderstand their intentions. Also, eye candy eventually turns out to be a crush. Especially if you see them frequently.
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